Hi, can you come to my house tonight and help put my Christmas Tree up? I want it in my bedroom.
Why did Mohammed cross the road? Because he’s a really great guy and was doing some important charity work.
My wife’s a bit like Pinocchio. Every time she tells me lies, her nose swells up.
I like to call my penis ‘The Pizza’. Not because it’s twelve inches, but because its covered in cheese, and the occasional mushroom.
Apparantly some butch lesbians have now started taking viagra to become harder!!
Did you hear about that new black body builder from Austria who’s going to be a movie star? His name is Arnold Schwarzenigger.