If you want a promotion walk into your office and shout “Vodka, tequila, sambuca!” at the top of your voice.
This will make you the person who calls the shots.
Can you send me a message because then I can tell my friends I’ve received a message from an angel?
Wow I bet you could breastfeed a whole nursery of babies.
Did you hear about the gay midget? He finally came out the closet.
Don’t you just hate it when your clothes mysteriously vanish and you get arrested for being half-naked in public. That’s the last time I ever wear Bermuda shorts again.
Q. What’s the worst thing about elections?
A. There’s always some cunt who wins.