Before calling the police to tell them you have a Kangaroo in your garden make sure it’s not the next door neighbors’ greyhound taking a dump.
I’ve decided I’m never going to jack off in the shower ever again.
Just been informed by the police that I’ve now been given a lifetime ban from the Auschwitz Museum.
Q. Why do gays make the best dads? A. Because they know where all the parks are.
Q. What’s the difference between toilet paper and news paper? A. Toilet paper is brown and smells bad.
Q. How do you make a cat flap? A. Throw it off a cliff.
Yo mama is so fat she doesn’t smoke weed, she deep fries it.