Best Short Jokes All Time

Collection of the all time best funny short jokes sorted by user rating.

Morning

in Dirty Jokes
+128 -64

Why do women rub their eyes in the morning?
Because they don’t have any balls to scratch.

Bottle

in General Jokes
+116 -53

Why is it that when a baby drinks from a bottle and falls asleep everyone thinks it’s cute but when I do it I get arrested at my local bus station and people call me an alcoholic?

Muslim Inventions

in Religious Jokes
+136 -73

The Muslims first invented the condom in the year 654 using a goat intestine. Christians expanded on this idea in 1364 by taking the intestine out of the goat first.

Yo Mama is Retarded

in Yo Mama Jokes
+160 -97

3 reasons why yo mama is retarded:

1. She thinks typing ‘Google’ into Google will break the internet.
2. She thinks Blue-Ray is a type of fish.
3. She lost her job at the M&M factory for throwing away all the W’s.

Bird Singing

in Animal Jokes
+162 -100

Do birds really “sing” or are they actually releasing tiny screams because they’re scared of heights?

Store

in Dirty Jokes
+105 -43

They told me to wear a mask and gloves when going to the store.

They lied… Everyone else had clothes on.