Best Short Jokes All Time

Collection of the all time best funny short jokes sorted by user rating.

Car Horn

in General Jokes
+117 -52

Loving the new mp3 car horn I’ve recently installed. It’s amazing how much quicker people get out of your way when they start hearing gunshots.

How Many

in Relationship Jokes
+105 -40

Wife: How many women have you slept with?
Me: Only you, I was too busy to sleep while shagging the other women!
Wife: Right, pack your bags I want you out!
Me: That’s fine.
Wife: I hope you have a slow and painful death!
Me: I’m confused, does that mean you want me to stay now?

Suit

in Racist Jokes
+143 -78

Q. What do call a black guy in a suit?

A: The defendant.

Lifes Great Mysteries

in General Jokes
+148 -84

A recent study has revealed the top 3 greatest mysteries of life that people struggle with on a daily basis.

1. If sliced bread is so great why is the person who invented it not famous?
2. If blind people wear sunglasses then why don’t deaf people wear earmuffs?
3. If Chinese people all look the same, why do they need passports?

Holy Fat Person

in Yo Mama Jokes
+151 -87

Yo mama is so fat , she was baptized at SeaWorld ?

Morning

in Dirty Jokes
+128 -64

Why do women rub their eyes in the morning?
Because they don’t have any balls to scratch.