Can’t believe how thirsty my Grandma is. Just drove past her house and she’s got about 10 pints of milk on her doorstep.
Managed to fake my first orgasm with my wife the other night. I just made a loud grunting noise and then poured warm yogurt on her ass.
Are you religious? Because you’re the answer to all my prayers.
Al Qaeda made a huge mistake knocking down both Twin Towers. Just think how embarrassing it would be only having one Twin Tower.
Why do paedos always have beards and glasses? What is it about that look that children find so sexy?
My younger brother recently became involved with drugs and it’s totally turned his life upside down. He now drives a Porche and has his own house which he paid for in cash.