Best Short Jokes All Time

Collection of the all time best funny short jokes sorted by user rating.

German Market

in Racist Jokes
+60 -79

Went to a German market last week. My Jewish granddad would have been so proud to see me enjoying the hard work of hundreds of Germans locked in tiny wooden sheds.

Think I’m Cute Funny Joke

in Pick Up Lines
+7 -26

Hi, me and my friend were just talking and he wondered if you think I’m cute.

Candle Holder

in General Jokes
+21 -40

Went to the supermarket today to find a candle holder but they didn’t have one so I decided to buy a cake instead.

Samsung Phone

in General Jokes
+23 -42

According to my Samsung phone my ‘morning run’ has been changed to ‘morning rum’. Sounds good to me.

Cooking

in General Jokes
+7 -26

My cooking is awful.

Does anyone know how much vodka you’re supposed to add to cheese-on-toast?

Women Like Car

in Dirty Jokes
+9 -28

Q. Why are women like cars?
A. Because sometimes you have to use a choke to get them going.