Went shopping earlier today and got my wife something for her vaggina as a Christmas present, it’s called ‘DE-ICER’.
Fat lives matter as well you know. Please open the Goddamn buffet!
Q. Why do women talk too much and men overthink everything? A. Because women have 4 lips and men have 2 heads.
Do you have sunburn or are you always this hot??
A recent scientific study has found that having sex burns a large amount of calories. This is especially true when you do it without consent and you have to run away.
My daughters just got to the age where she’s starting to ask awkward questions about sex. Then other day she asked “Is that the best you can do?”