Just found out my Asian friend died last week… So Yung.
Just had the following conversation with my mum
Me: I’m going out! Mum: You’re not leaving until you’ve changed that mini-skirt!! Me: Why? Mum: Because I can see your balls Richard.
Today I did that thing where you walk into a room and totally forgot what you went in for. It was only when the shit started running down my leg that I remembered
Just had a really big argument with my wife about going on holiday. I wanted to go to Paris, she wanted to come with me.
Whenever it rains, my wife just stands at the window looking kind of sad. Maybe I should let her in.
Yo mama is so stupid, she ate my homework because I said it was a piece of cake!