The following conversation took place in Vienna, Austria 200 years ago on this very day.
Mozart’s Friend: Wolfgang Mozart!! Mozart: What?
They were then both eaten by a gang of wolves. RIP Mozart.
When I was a child my parents used to wrap me up in cotton wool… which is why I was taken away by social services.
Why are scousers similar to batman? Because Robin helps them to survive.
A lot of people criticize the American government’s policy of bombing foreign countries to make them more peaceful but on the plus side it’s a great way for Americans to learn geography.
What do coffee beans and woman have in common?
They’re both useless until their wet.
Spent the whole of last night sitting in bed thinking about the sun and where it comes from …. and then it dawned on me.