Best Short Jokes All Time

Collection of the all time best funny short jokes sorted by user rating.

Valentines Poem Aggressive

in Relationship Jokes
+26 -37

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Love me today
Or I Kill you.

Pot Smokers

in General Jokes
+23 -34

Some people say pot smokers are lazy. I disagree. I’m a multitasking pot smoker. Just the other day I was walking down the street, smoking, talking on my cellphone and getting hit by a car all at the same time.

Spontaneous

in Relationship Jokes
+21 -32

Today my wife told me that I need to be more spontaneous so I punched her in the throat.

Mozart

in General Jokes
+13 -24

The following conversation took place in Vienna, Austria 200 years ago on this very day.

Mozart’s Friend: Wolfgang Mozart!!
Mozart: What?

They were then both eaten by a gang of wolves. RIP Mozart.

Bombing

in Political Jokes
+24 -35

A lot of people criticize the American government’s policy of bombing foreign countries to make them more peaceful but on the plus side it’s a great way for Americans to learn geography.

Coffee Beans

in Dirty Jokes, Relationship Jokes
+41 -52

What do coffee beans and woman have in common?

They’re both useless until their wet.