The first rule of Thesaurus Club is, you don’t talk, converse, discuss or vocalise about Thesaurus Club.
Q. What do you call a woman paralyzed from the waste down? A. Married
I was talking to a fat lass with huge tits last night. “My eyes are up here…” I said, as she looked down at the kebab in my hand.
During the first few weeks at my new job someone kept stealing my sandwiches from the work fridge. One day I decided to make them a cat food sandwich, the stealing has now stopped.
Q. How many policemen does it take to screw in a light-bulb?
A. None they will just beat the room for being black.
When your ex-girlfriend tells you she has AIDS it can be really difficult to deal with. I had to try really hard to sound surprised.