Yo mama is so ugly she makes onions cry!
I disabled my popup blocker earlier today, or got a divorce as some people call it.
Why did the blond girl have a bruised belly button?
Because her husband was a blond too!
I used to think I was telepathic with the ability to hear people’s thoughts but today my psychiatrist told me I have schizophrenia.
They say opposites attract, try telling that to my short ugly girlfriend.
How do you starve a black person?
Hide their welfare check under their work boots.