Screwing someone from work is great unless you work in a primary school.
Just been told I’m not a suitable candidate after the following conversation.
Interviewer: So why do you want this job? Me: Well I’ve always been really passionate about not starving to death.
A black man was spying on me last night while I was watching Sperminator 2 on my pc. I now really regret voting for him in the 2012 elections.
I found the off-switch on women. It’s in the back of their heads.
You have to use a bat to activate it.
Q. Why did the airport go to the hospice? A. Because it had terminal cancer.
Just managed to save a load of money on my car insurance. After I had a crash I just drove away really fast and then went into hiding for 3 weeks.