Best Short Jokes All Time

Collection of the all time best funny short jokes sorted by user rating.

Cancer

in General Jokes
+15 -21

My grandfather developed cancer when he was younger.

Some say he’s the most evil scientist who ever lived.

Healthy Eating

in General Jokes
+9 -15

Can’t believe how dangerous healthy eating can be. Just cut myself peeling an apple, think I will stick to chocolate bars in the future.

Alcohol Intake

in General Jokes
+19 -25

The Doctor looked me squarely in the eye. “You seriously need to reduce your alcohol intake or you’ll ruin what’s left of your liver completely.” “Fuck off, Doc,” I replied. “You always say that when it’s your round. Get the beers in, you tight cunt.”

Vegetable Eating

in Surreal Jokes
+36 -42

Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? the wheelchair

Heaven

in Surreal Jokes
+13 -19

The saddest day of my life was seeing my mum crying after my dad went to heaven. Heaven was the name of his favourite gay massage parlour.

Free

in Dirty Jokes
+18 -24

People say the best things in life are free but those people have clearly never had sex.