Got some condoms earlier today from the self checkout machine at the supermarket and it said “Unexpected item in the checkout area”… cheeky b*stard.
Wow you’re so hot I’m gonna put you on my bucket list of things to do.
My insomnia is terrible at the moment. On the plus side only 3 more sleeps till Christmas.
What is the fastest country?
Iran
I’m beggining to have doubts about my wife. She got sacked last week for drinking on the job…. she works in a sperm bank.
Q. Why did the New Zealand farmer become a Muslim? A. Because he really loves ‘islamb.