3 reasons why too much beer can turn a man into a woman. 1. Gives you manboobs. 2. Makes you talk nonsense. 3. Reduces your driving skills.
An ironing board is just a surfboard that gave up on its dreams and got a real job.
I asked this girl earlier which is more important, length or girth? Turns out it’s consent.
Did you hear about the Irish terrorist who tried to blow up a bus? He got severe burn marks on his mouth from the exhaust pipe.
How do you know when a crab is drunk? It walks forwards.
Why is the letter W called double-u and not double-V?