An ironing board is just a surfboard that gave up on its dreams and got a real job.
First date with a Jewish girl didn’t go too well tonight. I heard women love a man in uniform but apparently not a German SS uniform from the 1940s.
I asked this girl earlier which is more important, length or girth? Turns out it’s consent.
Met a woman in a bar last night, took her back to mine and I couldn’t get it up.
She said “Don’t worry, it’s totally normal, used to happen to me all the time before the operation”.
How do you know when a crab is drunk? It walks forwards.
Why is the letter W called double-u and not double-V?