Genesis 1:13 “And on the 3rd day God created the land for all the animals to share but he decided to make a special piece of land called Antarctica just for penguins because he liked them and thought they were cute.”
I’ve been happily married for 4 years – out of a total of 25
What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college? A: Bison.
Have you heard about that new social media platform for people with bowel problems?
It’s called Shitter.
Went to a barbershop today for a shave. The barber wanted me to put a small wooden ball in my mouth to get a closer shave around my cheeks.
I said: “What if I swallow the ball?” He said: “No problem, just bring it back tomorrow like everyone else.”
My autistic brother recently got arrested after his first day at work as a taxi driver. I should never have told him to “knock em dead”.