Just broke up with my girlfriend. Don‘t know where me and Helen (or ‘saggy tits’ as I used to call her) went wrong.
What flavour ice-cream do electricians like to eat? Shock-a-lot!
How many Alzheimer’s patients does it take to change a light-bulb?
To get to the other side.
Heard on the news that the worlds oldest man died earlier today. Why does this keep happening?
Yo mama so fat she don’t need internet, she’s already worldwide.
Phoned the NHS line today and said, “I’m having a real problem getting an erection.”
“Well we’re here to help you as much as we can sir,” the woman replied.
“Great!” I burst out. “What colour panties are you wearing?”