Trying to get into shape at the moment. The shape I’m going for this month is chicken nugget.
Yo mama is so stupid she went to the library and asked for Facebook!
After being homeless for a week I found a copy of the bible and it has totally changed my life.
I now have toilet paper and fire to keep me warm.
The best thing about having a prostitute die on you is that you get to have the 2nd hour for free
I’m an animal in bed. I like to be patted on the head and given food.
Can’t believe I wasn’t allowed to emigrate to Australia because of my criminal record. You’d think they’d be more understanding given the history.