Best Short Jokes All Time

Collection of the all time best funny short jokes sorted by user rating.

Dec

Bad Response

By DavidC

+16 -14

Just been arrested at the airport. Apparently “How many do you need?” is a bad response to the question “Do you have any firearms?”

Jan

Lottery Win

By Bernie

in Relationship Jokes

Tags: Wife Jokes

+21 -19

The following conversation took place between a wife and husband after a lottery win.

Husband: Pack your bags honey, I’ve just won the lottery!!
Wife: What??
Husband: Pack your bags, I’ve just won the lottery!!
Wife: Now way!! This is amazing!! Where are we going?
Husband: We’re going nowhere, just pack your bags and f*ck off!!

Apr

Luck With Women

By HoyceG

in Relationship Jokes

+21 -19

I’ve never had any luck with women. When I was a baby my mother refused to breastfeed me, she said she only liked me as a friend.

May

Joiner

By Jordan

in Religious Jokes

Tags: Paki Jokes

+59 -57

What do you call a Pakistani joiner?
A-med-a-shed

Jan

Vaccine

By KingBilly

in Political Jokes

Tags: Virus jokes

+8 -6

Just had the Covid vaccine. Anyone know where I can get a Windows 10 upgrade and Office 365? Just had a sudden urge to buy Microsoft software.

Oct

Gun Manuals

By Daws

in General Jokes

+18 -16

Do gun manuals have a “trouble shooting?” section?