How come everyone loves it when when a magician makes stuff disappear but when an airline pilot does it everyone freaks out?
Q. Why did the Rabbi get the sack? A. Because he performed a circumcision without wearing his glasses.
Man: Hi wanna dance? Woman: Yeah sure! Man: Ok go and dance, I want to talk to your friend!
In the morning I like to do 7 sit ups. It’s not a lot but my alarm clock only allows you to press snooze so many times.
Thousands of people were crying tears of joy today as the Royal Baby was brought home. Hopefully the extra tissue sales will be enough to keep tissue manufacturers from going bankrupt after David Cameron’s recent ban on adult websites in the UK.
Q. Why do Mexico always fail during the Olympic pole vault contest? A. The best jumpers have all moved to the USA.