Q. What do you call a graffiti artist who‘s impotent? A. Blanksy.
Driving a sports car and staying under the speed limit is like going to McDonalds for a salad.
Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk past again?
My three-year-old son got into the bath with me last night.
“Why is your willy much longer and fatter than mine?”
“I don’t know, daddy,” he replied.
My wife made me dress up as a policeman last night. I really didn’t feel like going into work but apparently my sergeant called and threatened disciplinary action if I didn’t turn up.
RIP Granddad. He had the heart of a lion which is why he was shot by security guards trying to escape from the zoo.