Three things that can make a man depressed.
1. Job Sucks 2. Bank balance sucks 3. Wife doesn’t suck
Can’t believe how arrogant Russian dolls are… they’re so full of themselves.
Just received £10,000 after a recent accident at work. I pushed my boss down the stairs then drove off with his car which I sold on eBay.
I can‘t believe how uncaring some people are. I‘m trying to raise money for charity but every time I ask someone if they can spare some money to help spastics they look at me in disgust.
I saw a sign today day telling please keep off the grass. I wonder how it got there?
Went to the zoo yesterday and an elephant tried to charge me. I said “F*ck off, i’m not paying twice.”