Best Short Jokes All Time

Collection of the all time best funny short jokes sorted by user rating.

Jan

Laptop

By StephenP

in Dirty Jokes

+27 -24

Just had the following conversation with my wife.

Wife: Why is the laptop sticky?
Me: It’s not what you think, it’s ice cream.
Wife: How did you manage to get ice cream all over the laptop?
Me: Have you ever tried eating ice-cream and masterbating at the same time?

Sep

68 Position

By Frank

in Pick Up Lines

+24 -21

Man: Do you want a 68?
Woman: What’s that?
Man: You do me and I’ll owe you 1.

Sep

Psychiatrist

By Sam

in Relationship Jokes

Tags: Wife Jokes

+11 -8

Just told my wife I’ve been seeing a psychiatrist. She told me she’s been seeing a psychiatrist, a bartender and 2 plumbers.

Apr

Strippers

By Pete2

in General Jokes

+23 -20

If strippers are ‘exotic dancers’ then does that mean drug dealers are really ‘exotic pharmacists’?

Jul

Rescue Cat

By Dave

in Animal Jokes

+26 -23

Rescue cats are rubbish. My grandma fell down the stairs the other day and the cat did f*ck all.

Apr

Caesar Salad Recipe

By Brutus

in General Jokes

+9 -6

Get some salad and stab it twenty three times.