T-shirt stands for Tyrannosaurus-Shirt because it has short arms.
This year I’m dreaming of a white Christmas…
Not because I like snow but because I’m racist.
Can’t believe how dangerous the streets are becoming! Just this afternoon I stole an old ladys handbag and punched someone at a bus stop.
Just had an email about a cheap holiday in Syria. Don’t think I’ll BEHEADING to the Middle East any time soon.
If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is around to hear it… My illegal logging business is a great success.
Went on a date last night which was a total disaster. The girl told he over the phone she was expecting a baby, so I went to the pub wearing nothing but a nappy, felt like a right f*cking idiot!