My wife told me that she wants me to make her feel like a “real woman” so I took my shirt off and said “Here you go, iron this”.
Once you get past a certain age “getting lucky” is the thing that happens when your remember where you put down your keys.
Me and my girlfriend decided to start trying the whole long-distance relationship thing yesterday.
The police said I have to stay 100ft away from her and I have to stop calling her my girlfriend.
I don’t understand women. They love it when you sweep them off their feet but as soon as you lock them in the back of the van they start freaking out.
Sometimes all a man needs from a woman is a nice hug…. around the penis with a vagina.
Q. What do you call an Indian who cares about his health? A. Soshul Distan Singh.