Best Short Jokes All Time

Collection of the all time best funny short jokes sorted by user rating.

Total Opposites

in Relationship Jokes
+25 -19

Me and my wife are total opposites. She donates money to the homeless, I donate money to the topless.

Sat-Nav

in Religious Jokes
+31 -25

Q. What do Islam and sat-navs have in common?
A. They both make you smash into buildings if you follow them too closely.

Payday Loan

in Political Jokes
+17 -11

The UK government has recently referred to payday loan companies as “idiotic” for trying to target children and get them into debt. I agree, everyone knows the best way to get a child into debt is to offer them a student loan.

Food Banks

in Political Jokes
+34 -28

It looks like food banks are just as corrupt as normal banks. I deposited a pack of biscuits at my food bank last week and when I went to collect them today they told me they had gone.

Heaven Pickup Line

in Pick Up Lines
+43 -37

Did you fall from heaven?
… Because you remind me of Satan.

Girlfriend

in Relationship Jokes
+16 -10

I just can’t seem to get a girlfriend even though I can speak two languages fluently.

English and Klingon.