Best Short Jokes All Time

Collection of the all time best funny short jokes sorted by user rating.

Oct

Hospital Visit

By Dave

in General Jokes

+40 -33

Just had the following conversation at hospital.

Nurse: What happened to your fingers?
Me: You know those chefs who cut vegetables really fast?
Nurse: Yes?
Me: I can’t do that.

Jun

Bus Travel Tips

By Dave

in General Jokes

+11 -4

Get more value for money by sitting on top of the bus. Due to the circumference of the Earth you’ll travel an extra 0.0000000000013% further than the people downstairs.

Apr

French Pickup Line

By Don Juan

in Pick Up Lines

+24 -17

Bonjour Madam, Are you a tower??? Because Eiffel for you!

Jun

Racist

By JohnnyB

in Racist Jokes

Tags: Black Jokes, Wife Jokes

+45 -38

Someone called me racist the other day. I can’t be racist, my wife has a black eye.

Jul

nice eyes

By haadi

in Racist Jokes

Tags: Chinese Jokes

+39 -33

Me: You have nice eyes
Yi Qing Wong: Thanks
Me: Its a shame i cant see them

Jan

Methane Emissions

By Steve

in Political Jokes

+25 -19

Heard on the radio today that global warming is being caused by methane emissions from cows. Does this mean scientists are finally admiting global warming is bullsh*t?