Get more value for money by sitting on top of the bus. Due to the circumference of the Earth you’ll travel an extra 0.0000000000013% further than the people downstairs.
I sat there with a smile on my face as my girlfriend wrapped her hand around it and started to tug at it. An even bigger smile when she gave it a little wiggle and started moving it around. I couldn’t contain myself when she started using two hands, so I eventually laughed out:
“Here, love, I’ll shift gear for you.”