I’m proud to say I donated over $10 million to disabled gymnasts in Eastern Europe last year. Apparently they contacted my bank to let me know that ‘the invalid Czechs were bouncing’ which is great news.
If you want to change the world do it while you’re single. Once you get married you can’t even change the TV channel.
Why do deaf people make the best gynecologists?
Because they’re good at reading lips.
A wife can help turn you into a millionaire. If you start off as a billionaire.
My wife died and I couldn’t look at another women for over 10 years.
Now I’m out of jail I think it was probably a price worth paying.
What do you call an Indian with a dot on his head? A push start. What do you call an Indian with a turban on his head? A pull start.