I’ve decided to start an educational campaign to tell people about the health benefits of eating dried grapes.
It’s all about raisin awareness.
I’ve decided to dedicate my life to getting prostitutes off the streets.
Usually for an hour or so each time.
“One man’s rubbish is another man’s treasure” is an awesome phrase. But it was a horrible way to find out that I was adopted.
A dog can learn up to 250 words and count up to 5. Equivalent Human age = 3.
A cat doesn’t give a f*ck and is sick of your sh*t. Equivalent human age = 42.
What has two wings and a halo?
A Chinese telephone.
If you download mp3s while on holiday in Jamaica, does that make you a ‘Pirate of the Caribbean’?