Question: What do you call a cat who is a sexually depraved?
Answer A Purrvert
This girl came up to me today and said she recognized me from vegetarian club. I was confused, I’d never met herbivore.
Can I take a photo with you because I want to show Santa what I want for Christmas.
In my previous job I used to take a lot of notes. I got fired after they started checking the cash register.
Just ordered a licence number plate BAA BAA.
Should look cool on my black jeep.
Tried to share a sandwich with a homeless guy today. He said, “F*ck off. Get your own.”