Best Short Jokes All Time

Collection of the all time best funny short jokes sorted by user rating.

Feb

Zoo

By SteveB

in Animal Jokes

+35 -20

Went to the zoo yesterday and saw a discarded baguette in the monkey enclosure.

It was bread in captivity.

Oct

During Sex

By Steve

in Relationship Jokes

+51 -36

Four words men hate during sex.
“Is it in yet!”

Four words women hate during sex.
“Hey honey I’m home!”

Mar

Hospital

By The Judge

in General Jokes

+46 -31

The following conversation took place in a hospital.

Doctor: I’m sorry you’ve got AIDs.
Patient: Can I have a 2nd opinion?
Doctor: Yeah sure, you’re ugly as well.

Aug

Thesaurus

By Wayne

in General Jokes

+24 -9

What’s another word for thesaurus?

Apr

Jesus Love You

By Ronaldo

in Dirty Jokes

+29 -14

Hearing the words “Jesus loves you” in a church it feels nice.
Hearing the words “Jesus loves you” in a Mexican prison is quite scary and is usually followed by severe ass pain.

Jun

Watching TV

By Nigel Grocock

in Relationship Jokes

Tags: Wife Jokes

+28 -13

The wife and I were sitting on the couch watching the TV and it was boring so I thought I’d start a conversation.

Me: How many men have you had in total?
Wife: Are sure you want to know?
Me: Yeh, go on.
Wife: 7.
Me (after a pause): so I was number 7.
Wife: no, you were number 2.