I remember in the 90’s when Instagram was the name of my cocaine dealer.
Why do blondes not talk while making love? Their moms told them not to talk to strangers.
I read a story in the newspaper the other day about a father who paid his daughter for sex. I was absolutely disgusted.
What kind of daughter charges her own father?
Q. Who has the best business model someone who deals drugs or a stripper? A. A stripper because she can wash her crack and sell it again.
Reading Lord of the Rings at the moment. Apparently Gollum used to be normal but wearing the ring drained him of energy.
Reminds me a lot of my marriage.
The following conversation took place between me and my uncle.
Uncle: The camera on my new IPhone, it’s amazing. It even works under water. Me: That’s great uncle Steve, but can I please finish my bath now??