Research scientists have discovered that fat women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it.
Just been punched by my brother for trying to kiss he new baby on the forehead. Apparently I have to wait for the baby to be born first.
Robin: Hey Batman, wanna hear a joke? Batman: Sure Robin, what is it? Robin: Knock knock Batman: Who’s there? Robin: NOT YOUR PARENTS
Just got a bike for my wife…it was a good trade.
Q. What do women and bacon have in common? A. They both look, smell and taste amazing but they also both slowly kill you.
A horse walks into a bar… The bartender says “Why the long face?”
The horse, unable to speak English, shits on the floor and leaves.