The following conversation took place between a husband and wife at the dinner table.
Wife: Can I have $20’000 to get some breast implants to make them bigger.
Husband: Why don’t you just rub toilet paper on your nipples.
Wife: Does that really work?
Husband: Well it seems to have worked on your ass.
Man: What hand do you wipe your bum with?
Woman: Right hand.
Man: Oh really, I use toilet paper.
Yo mama smells so bad when flies land on her they always throw up.
Got a Pakistani monopoly set the other day, there’s a shop on every corner.
Q. Why do gay men like to have sex in toilets?
A. Because you can’t catch Aids sitting on a toilet seat.
Don’t you just hate it when your clothes mysteriously vanish and you get arrested for being half-naked in public. That’s the last time I ever wear Bermuda shorts again.