Best Funny Dirty Jokes

The best top rated funny short dirty jokes of all time. Hilariously rude humor that looks at the funny side of sex.

Aug

Man Women Torch

By The Judge

in Dirty Jokes

+23 -30

A man and a woman begin having sex in the middle of a field. After about 10 minutes, the man gets up and says, “Damn, I wish I had a torch!”. The woman says, “Me too, you’ve been eating grass for the past ten minutes!”

Feb

Three Steps

By Sammy

in Dirty Jokes

+25 -32

Three steps to safely remove a woman’s bra.

1. Cut straps with scissors, be careful as scissors can be sharp.
2. Never make comments about her nipples being weird.
3. If you’re in a supermarket make sure she isn’t carrying any glass bottles.

Dec

Drink

By BJ

in Dirty Jokes

+18 -25

The following conversation took place between a 10 yr old boy and his dad.

Boy: I’ve had sex with my teacher today!
Dad: Way to go son, I’m gonna get you that bike you wanted!
Boy: No thanks dad, after all that sex the saddle will really hurt my ass.

Feb

Gynecologist

By Chris

in Dirty Jokes

+12 -20

I used to be a gynecologist but I had to quit due to health reasons. I kept getting tunnel vision.

Mar

Inflatable

By Rod

in Dirty Jokes

+20 -28

Made love to an Inflatable doll the other day. Now I have an inflatable guy looking for me.

Jul

Chicken

By Dave

in Dirty Jokes

+17 -25

Q. What do you get if you insert human DNA into a chicken?
A. Banned from the supermarket