Best Funny Dirty Jokes

The best top rated funny short dirty jokes of all time. Hilariously rude humor that looks at the funny side of sex.

Pedo

in Dirty Jokes
+37 -25

I read somewhere that 15% of the people live next to a pedophile… Luckily I don’t, I live next to a beautiful 7 year old.

Dedicated

in Dirty Jokes
+21 -9

I’ve decided to dedicate my life to getting prostitutes off the streets.

Usually for an hour or so each time.

Bush

in Dirty Jokes
+31 -19

Just trimmed my bush… I love gardening.

This Year

in Dirty Jokes
+25 -14

So far this year I’ve had sex a number of times.
Unfortunately that number is 0.

Small

in Dirty Jokes, Relationship Jokes
+52 -41

My new girlfriend from Thailand said that having a small dick is no problem. I really like her but I think I’d still prefer it if she didn’t have one.

Dentist

in Dirty Jokes
+39 -28

Went to the dentist today and he told me I had to stop touching myself. I said “What’s that got to do with my teeth?”. He said “Nothing but I just find it really distracting”.