Best Funny Animal Jokes

Contains funny animal jokes and dirty one liners that will have you in stitches.

Parrot

in Animal Jokes
+12 -20

If you have a parrot and you don’t teach it to say,”Help, I’ve been turned into a parrot!”, you’re wasting everyone’s time.

Sharp Teeth

in Animal Jokes
+29 -37

What animal has sharp teeth and 5 legs?

A pit bull in a playground.

Swimming Prejudice

in Animal Jokes
+13 -22

Why does nobody care when you take a child swimming but when you take a chimpanzee everyone freaks out?

Crossbars

in Animal Jokes
+15 -24

What do you get if you cross a hippo, elephant and a rhino?

..A Helephino!!

Puppy

in Animal Jokes
+14 -23

I bought my son a puppy for Christmas, but I’ve just accidentally killed him with my car as I reversed onto the drive. Oh well, I’ll have to look after the puppy myself now.

Drink Milk

in Animal Jokes
+24 -33

Why is it that if you drink milk from a cow society thinks that’s normal but if you drink milk from another human you get arrested by security guards?