Best Short Jokes All Time

Collection of the all time best funny short jokes sorted by user rating.

Clocks Forward

in Dirty Jokes
+176 -75

Managed to make love for 1 hour and 5 minutes last night. I love it when they put the clocks forward.

Mexico

in Racist Jokes
+191 -91

Q: What is Mexico’s favorite sport.
A: Cross-country.

Sperm Bank

in Dirty Jokes
+135 -36

I wonder if the receptionist at the sperm bank ever uses the phrase “Thanks for coming!”?

Ambushed

in Relationship Jokes
+145 -46

After visiting our house my mother-in-law got ambushed by 6 men who starting punching her. My wife shouted “Are you gonna help?”, I said “6 should be enough!”

Voice In Head

in Animal Jokes, Dirty Jokes
+181 -83

As she lay there in my bed next to me I thought to myself “relax, you’re not the first doctor to sleep with a patient” but the other voice in my head said “But Howard you are a vet”.

Guinness World Records

in General Jokes
+180 -82

My penis was once in the Guinness World Records.

Until the librarian told me to take it out.