Best Short Jokes All Time

Collection of the all time best funny short jokes sorted by user rating.

Sep

Fish Spa Therapy

By Johnny

in Surreal Jokes

+22 -18

Took my grandma to a fish spa therapy center where the fish eat dead skin for only $45. It was so much cheaper than getting her buried in the cemetery.

May

Broken Down

By Jim

in General Jokes

+24 -20

The following conversation took place this morning.

Me: Sorry boss can’t come in today my car has broken down.
Boss: What about the bus?
Me: I don’t have a bus.

Feb

Job

By Harvey

in Dirty Jokes

+34 -30

What is the difference between a job and a dead prostitute?
A job still sucks.

Jul

Hay Fever

By Dave134

in General Jokes

+20 -16

If pollen is ‘plant sperm’ then does that mean people who suffer from hay fever are actually being raped trees?

If so then trees should be chopped down as revenge in my opinion.

Apr

Landscape Gardener

By Steve

in General Jokes

+8 -4

Hired a landscape gardener but he’s said he’s unable to help me because my garden is portrait.

Dec

Christmas Shopping

By Sammy

in Relationship Jokes

+17 -13

I finally got my own back for Christmas shopping: I took my girlfriend into eight different pubs without getting a drink and then went back into the first one and bought a pint.