Best Short Jokes All Time

Collection of the all time best funny short jokes sorted by user rating.

Nov

Alcohol Problem

By Paul

in General Jokes

+2 -15

I recently started taking steps to cure my alcohol problem. It hasn’t worked, I’ve just got loads of angry window cleaners looking for me and a house full of ladders.

Jan

Snooker

By Chris

in Racist Jokes

+50 -63

Q. What do snooker balls and people who claim benefits have in common?

A. Most of them are non-white.

Dec

Food Poisoning

By Dave

in General Jokes

+5 -18

Got food poisoning from a restaurant today. I ordered the fish of the day… unfortunately it turns out the day was actually last week.

Aug

Eggs Pickup Line

By Dave

in Pick Up Lines

+20 -33

How do you like your eggs in the morning because if it’s fertilized then I’m your man.

May

Doctors

By Maisie

in General Jokes

+21 -34

My neighbor Bob went to the doctors.
Bob said that he has hearing problems.
So the doctor said explain your symptoms .
Bob said “Marge has blue hair and Homer is fat.”

Oct

Ice-cream

By Dave

in General Jokes

+17 -30

If everything is made of atoms why does ice-cream taste really nice and dog shiite taste so bad? Explain that one Einstein.