My dwarf friend committed suicide recently… He jumped off a curb.
Went to the doctors yesterday and told him that every time I drink coffee I get a stabbing pain in my right eye.
He advised me to take the spoon out of the cup.
Is “buttcheeks” one word?
Or should I spread them apart?
Mexicans have been complaining recently about Trumps wall, they really need to get over it.
A recent scientific study showed that out of 2,293,618,367 people, 94% are too lazy to actually read that number.
They say one in every four men is gay, so there must be one in my group of friends.
I hope it’s Michael – he’s super cute.